Metro TeenAIDS

Why you should talk to your teenager

75% of 10th graders in the metropolitan area have had sex.
40% of these young people have had four or more partners.
Children's Hospital estimates that there are 3,000 adolescents/young adults in the DC Metro area who are HIV infected, and that most of them don't know it.

Know the facts.

It's important to be comfortable talking about HIV-related issues such as sex and drugs. Knowing the facts helps. The better informed you are, the better educated your child will be. Here are some basic points to start with:

AIDS is a disease which attacks the immune system. It is caused by a virus named HIV. One can be infected with the HIV virus for a long time before any symptoms of full-blown AIDS appear. AIDS is invariably fatal. There is no known cure for HIV or AIDS.
HIV can be transmitted through semen, vaginal fluid, or blood. Any activity where these fluids are exchanged can transmit the virus. This means that one can get AIDS by having sex or by sharing needles with an infected person. People who are infected with HIV are called HIV-positive. They do not look or act differently from normal people -- without a blood test, there is no way to tell them apart from non-infected people. It is not unusual for someone to be HIV-positive and not know it.
HIV is not transmitted through casual, everyday contact. You can't get HIV through hugging, shaking hands, sharing utensils, coughing, or even deep kissing. You won't get it through donating blood, nor will you get AIDS.
Latex condoms, especially those coated with nonoxynol-9, greatly reduce one's risk of infection. Use them.

top of page

Respect his/her space.

Have the discussion in your child's space, and at a convenient time for him/her. This helps make sure that your child is comfortable, and creates a good environment for communication. Along with this, take care not to pry into your child's private life. The purpose of this discussion is to give your child the information he/she needs to make responsible decisions -- don't let control issues obscure your message.

Be informative without burying him/her in details. Determine what facts about sex and AIDS your child knows, and supplement this with any important missing details. Be aware that your teenager may know more, or less, than you about these issues.

top of page

Be honest and flexible.

If you are uncomfortable talking about these issues, say so. Candor can be disarming, and make both of you feel more at ease. Keep in mind that your teenager probably also feels uncomfortable.

Establish a dialogue. It is important to show love and respect for the teenager; encourage your teenager to air his/her thoughts. Initially, it is common to be met with aloofness. This does not mean that your words are not being listened to -- keep trying in good faith to communicate and eventually discussion will open up. Discussion should not be a one-time phenomenon, either: on-going dialogues are the most effective way for both parties to communicate.

top of page

Other sources of information . . .

There are many additional sources of advice on how to talk to teenagers about sex, drugs, and AIDS. Other parents, teachers, guidance counselors, family doctors, nurses, priests, ministers, or rabbis can help. You can also contact your local Health Department (ask to speak to the Adolescent Case Coordinator) or Planned Parenthood.

top of page